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Saying "No" Gets Things Done: Five Important
Ways to Avoid Over-committing
Yourself
Saying no can often be a very difficult thing to do. No can be
a very scary word. It can cause an extensive amount of anger,
damage to relationships, and an overwhelming feeling of guilt.
No, though, is often a very important word. It can help keep
you from over-committing yourself, which can cause stress.
Stress only leads to poor mental health which can lead to all
sorts of unpleasant things. Avoid over-commitment by using
these five strategies to say no.
One of the best ways to say no is to focus on your goals at
hand. Ensuring that you have enough time for your goals and
your family is essential to saying no. Convince yourself that
your goals are just as important as the task you are being
asked to do, then simply say no. You will understand that your
tasks require your focus, and the other task is utterly
unimportant. It is okay to be selfish sometimes. Finding time
to meet your personal goals is essential to good mental health.
Your personal time for your goals is like any other task on
your calendar, and taking time to complete that task is always
a good idea. It may even help to block that time out on your
calendar as a visual reminder that your personal goals are just
as important as anything else on the schedule.
Another good way to say no and avoid over-commitment is to
tediously examine your calendar when you are asked to take on
another project. You need to be aware when you have reached
your schedule filling point. If you have too much on the
calendar, be honest about it. It is important to let people
know that you have accepted several other responsibilities, and
you are at the point where you can take on no more. If you
choose this method, though, be sure that you understand that no
one will fault you for already having too many things to do. It
is not necessary to make excuses if you do not have any free
time. It is not as if you are saying you can never help with
projects that person has to offer again, you are simply
refusing to help at this point in time. Most people never
develop an understanding of their self limits.
You can also avoid over-commitment by only taking on projects
that you are comfortable with. Having tasks to complete that
you feel uncomfortable doing, or that you feel unqualified to
do, only causes stress. There are a number of reasons you might
feel uncomfortable with a project including the people who are
involved in the project, the type of work that might be
involved, any sticky moral situations that might occur, or the
time it will take to complete the project. You may also feel
unqualified to complete the task for any number of reasons
including the fact that you do not have the skills necessary,
you do not have the experience necessary, or the project simply
seems to overwhelming for you to undertake. If you feel like
you will not be able to deliver quality work for any reason, by
all means, say no. Your comfort level in completing tasks is
paramount to what someone else wants you to do.
Avoiding over-commitment by saying no doesn't have to mean that
you are done with even discussing the project. You can
recommend someone who might be better to undertake the task.
You meet many people in the course of a lifetime who may be
able to offer the same skills and work ethic to the project you
are being asked to undertake. If that is the case, be sure to
tell the person you are refusing about the other individual.
This will not only help to ease the rejection you are about to
offer them, it may also help ease their minds because they will
be able to find someone to help out.
One final way to avoid over-commitment by saying no is only
saying no for the time at hand. You may really want to help
with the project, but you know you simply do not have the time
to offer at the moment. As a result, you can offer your
services at some other time or date in the future. This keeps
you from filling your schedule, but does not mean you cannot be
involved with the project. If the person cannot wait for your
help, never fear. They will find someone else who can help with
the project.
Over-commitment can cause real problems in your life. Learn to
say no.
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